Headstrong and Rather Disinclined to Compromise

After, literally, YEARS of waffling over this seminary decision, I find that I am now rather disinclined to settle for anything less. I have not yet even APPLIED at the school... so I do not know if I will be accepted or not... if I will be able to finance it or not (I am fairly sure I will be able to get financial aid), if I am going to be able to work out the housing and transportation logistics or not... and yet, this is all I want to do! Every other option just seems, somehow, not attractive.

There is a part of me that thinks "Who do you think you are? What make you think you are so special that you should get to do this?" But, lately, the louder voice answers "Why shouldn't I get to do this? I think I would be good at it, and besides... I deserve to work in a field that I find meaningful before I retire!"

This is probably not a good attitude to have so early on in the game. There is a lot that can go wrong, and Murphy is alive & well.

I got the information packet yesterday. Right now, I am leaning more towards the M.A. in Theology than the M-Div... but I still have to find out what UU would require and how all that goes. The "Option B" seems like the one that allows for the most flexibility. There are several career options in there that I find equally attractive... and, what if I can find work in one but not the other?

I have this strange feeling that an inflexible, dogmatic approach would be counter-productive.

In addition, I think that it is unwise to assume that there is nothing here that I cannot do. I am not invincible. There is already a heirarchy in place that I will have to answer to. The sooner I accept that fact, the better.